Archive for January, 2009CJL Announcements - 1/30/09Friday, January 30th, 2009This is the first official installment of “Cream Cheese in the Bagel Hole: Relationship Advice for Desperate Jews.” Dear Dr. Loovenmacher, I kissed a girl and I liked it. But recently my girlfriend has been hot but then all of a sudden, she’s cold! She’s yes then she’s no. She’s in then she’s out. She’s up then she’s down. She’s wrong when it’s right, she’s black and she’s white. We fight, we break up. We kiss, we make up. What do I do? Perry Dear Perry, I have not kissed a girl, or for that matter any animate object, but I imagine I would like it too. If your girl has been hot and then cold she’s probably going through menopause. If you are uncomfortable with this, then perhaps don’t go after cougars. Go after someone younger, though preferably legal. If first she says yes and then she says no then she is probably schizophrenic and I can’t advise you on that. Honestly I do not understand what you mean when you say that she is up and then she is down. Are you talking emotionally? Is she climbing a tree or something? If you’re going to write me a letter at least make it clear what you are talking about! As to whether she’s black or white, I’m contractually not allowed to deal with race issues. Your relationship is strawberry cream cheese. Yes, it is intriguing, exotic, and perhaps enjoyable on a few occasions but ultimately too risky. Dump it and go for the more conventional chives type. This weeks shout-out goes to Aaron Sarna for rocking an awesome hairdo for the composite picture. (Editor’s note: Nathan (ahem, Dr. Loovenmacher) - stop making it look like I give myself shoutouts) Shabbat Dinner at 104 West!Come be a part of our warm, friendly community at 104 West!, this and every Friday Night! Check-in 6:15PM Dinner 6:45 PM After dinner come over to the CJL to have a few L’Chaims, see your old friends, and meet some new ones. Superbowl PartyBlue 42, Blue 42 hut hut hike. Yeah that’s right. Its that time of year again. Men knocking each other around to get a leather ball into an end zone. What could be better? So whether you’re rooting for Warner’s Cardinals, are a loyal Steelers fan, or just watch for the commercials and half time show come scarf down some food, pull up a seat, huddle around a big screen TV, and be ready to scream when Roethlisberger throws an interception. Sunday 2/1 in 104 West! Movie/Crafts/Beer Tasting NightsStarting this week, every other Monday night will be a movie night and every Wednesday night will be either a crafts night or a beer tasting night. Each movie will be of a different genre, every beer will have a different flavor and every craft will make the engineers feel inferior in a different way. The first beer tasting will be this Monday at 7:00PM. Wednesday at 7:30PM will be the first movie night and we will be showing West Side Story. The complete schedule can be viewed at www.cornellcjl.com/events. Shabbat TimesFriday, January 30: Saturday, January 31: Mincha/Maariv next week: 5:05 PM (CJL Shul) CJL Announcements - 1/23/09Thursday, January 22nd, 2009To all my new readers, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Dr. Loovenmacher. I received my PhD in pschology from an accredited university in Canada named—well you probably wouldn’t respect it, so I’ll spare you the details. The point is that the Cornell Jewish community was recently ranked as the second-most love frustrated community closely after Brandies. Therefore the board has asked me to help you all with my insightful insights (note to editor: find synonym. Use book that’s like a dictionary but not a dictionary) into the human heart and grant you all free relationship advice. I have named my column “Cream Cheese in the Bagel Hole: Relationship Advice for Desperate Jews.” Now supposedly some have detected a certain sexual innuendo with this title. I would like to say foremost that I am not a sex columnist, and therefore I certainly did not intend for any lewd double entendres. The reason for the title is as follows. Nobody intends to have his or her cream cheese in the bagel hole. It simply happens, sometimes completely by accident. Just like love. No one tries to find love, but when it happens it can be a magical thing, just like that perfect amount of cream cheese in the bagel hole. Or sometimes love/cream cheese can simply be too much. It can be smothering, sickening, and go sour after a while. So allow me to help you, or as much as any Canadian can (truthfully, that’s not much). Sincerely, Dr. Loovenmacher PhD This weeks shout-out goes to Lazar Polevoy for renovating the CJL shul into a brand new pool! Shabbat Dinner at 104 West!Come be a part of our warm, friendly community at 104 West!, this and every Friday Night! Check-in 6:15PM Dinner 6:45 PM After dinner come over to the CJL to have a few L’Chaims, see your old friends, and meet some new ones. IMPORTANT: Please do not go into the room behind the washing sinks in 104 West!. Construction is being done on that part of the building and it is not safe to be in there. Rabbi Shrader visiting CornellRabbi Menachem Shrader, founding director of JLIC, will be visiting Cornell! CJL CompositesThe photography session for this year’s CJL composite will be this coming Thursday 1/29 from 4:00-5:30 PM in the CJL Piano Room. If you would like to be in the composite, you must pay membership for this semester by Thursday. Please sign up for a time slot on the signup sheet next to the stairs in the CJL. For more information please see the email sent out earlier this week or contact Aaron Sarna (ays26). Superbowl PartyBlue 42, Blue 42 hut hut hike. Yeah that’s right. Its that time of year again. Men knocking each other around to get a leather ball into an end zone. What could be better? So whether you’re rooting for Warner’s Cardinals, are a loyal Steelers fan, or just watch for the commercials and half time show come scarf down some food, pull up a seat, huddle around a big screen TV, and be ready to scream when Roethlisberger throws an interception. Sunday 2/1 in 104 West! New WebsiteOver break some new features were added to the CJL website (www.cornellcjl.com). Now, after you’ve accidentally deleted the CJL announcements, you can still see them on the website and know exactly where you need to be when in order to live a happy life. Also, davening times are on the site for the entire semester!. There is a photo album that we are just starting to populate, so if you have photos from CJL events that you want to put up, please send them to webmaster@cornellcjl.com. We’ve also started putting up old CJL composites in the photo album so that you alumni who still read these announcements in order to live vicariously through us can see how silly you looked as college students. We have all of the composites since 1987 (although not all of them are online yet) but only a few earlier ones, so if you have a copy of your composite from before 1987, please be in touch and we’ll figure out how to get it on the site. Shabbat TimesFriday, January 23: Saturday, January 24: Mincha/Maariv next week: 5:00 PM (CJL Piano Room) Announcements on WebsiteWednesday, January 7th, 2009Starting this semester this space will contain the weekly CJL announcements. They will still be sent out on the CJL-l listserv, which you can sign up for on our homepage. |